What About The Speech?
How to get laughs, tears, and thunderous applause
How long is a good wedding speech?
Reading Time: 3 Minutes
What we’ll cover:
• What’s the best length for a great wedding speech?
• How long should bride and groom speech be?
• How many words should a wedding toast be?
We’ve all been there. The most boring speech in the world, and you have to sit there and listen. You struggle to stay awake… you fail. You wake up again – and it’s still going!!
Nobody wants a speech that’s to long.
But you don’t want to be too short either, do you? If you get up there and say ‘happy wedding day’ and sit down, nobody will be satisfied.
So how long should your wedding speech actually be? Read on for the answer.
What’s the best length for a great wedding speech?
The traditional (rather crude) answer is: “A good wedding speech is like a miniskirt: long enough to cover everything, short enough to keep it interesting.”
But this answer, aside from definite sexist overtones, doesn’t actually help that much, does it>
So let me try to be clearer:
The best length for a great wedding speech is between 3-7 minutes long.
Where did I get this number?
Experience, partly. But also logic: if it’s less than 3 minutes, you don’t have enough to time to say anything except ;’hi, my name is blah, I’m X’s sister and I’m really happy for everyone to be here.’ Then you’re done.
Not much of a speech.
So 3 minutes is the minimum time to say something worth saying (and worth hearing!) – ‘long enough to cover everything’.
But on no accounts, whatsoever, is a good wedding speech longer than 7 minutes. Let’s loiok at why.
First, yours is not the only speech. I most weddings, there are at least 4 speeches. So if everybody hits 7 minutes, the guests are basically sitting around for a full half hour.
And nobody, however interested, is going to take that in. Not when they’re in party mode – and it’s a wedding, so they should be!
The second reason is that if you need longer than 7 minutes, you’re saying too much. The rule for a good wedding speech is to keep things tight and clear; if you’re going over 7 minutes, I can guarantee that you’re not as clear as you should be.
The third reason 7 minutes is the maximum is that people get bored.
It doesn’t matter if you’re the bride or groom, people start shifting in their seats.
Sorry, but it’s true.
In fact, if you want to be really strict, the ideal length for a wedding speech is actually 3-5 minutes. I’m extending it to 7 to be generous – and to allow time for tears…
SO remember:
The best length for a great wedding speech is between 3-7 minutes long.
How long should a bride and groom speech be?
Sometimes couples like to do a joint speech. so a natural question might be, if they’re doing their speech together, can it be longer than 7 minutes?
Basically, no. the same rules apply.
Why?
Two reasons.
First, because if the joint speech is done with each person trading lines, it can be distracting. Not in a bad way – it just requires more focus. More focus means shorter attention – so stick to 3-7.
Second, longer than 7 minutes still means the message gets lost. You don’t want that.
So whether the speech is given by 1 person or 100, keep it 3-7 minutes.
But what does that actually mean in terms of writing? Let’s have a look now.
How many words should a wedding toast be?
Saying 3-7 minutes is all well and good, but how do you know I you’re sticking to time?
Well, obviously, you should practise. I can’t emphasise this enough. Your speaking pace is unique to you, andyou might want to emphasise some parts.
So always time yourself and speak it out loud.
But a good guide when you’re writing is that the average person speaks around 150 words per minute (wpm). But for a speech it’s natural to speak a little slower, so a good rule of thumb is:
130 words = 1 minute of speaking time
But let’s make it even easier and put that in a table:
3 minutes = 390 words
4 minutes = 520 words
5 minutes = 650 words
6 minutes = 780 words
7 minutes = 910 words
Remember, this is a guide only – but it’s a good one.
If you’re prone to emotion – or if you’re expecting a lot of laughs – it might be wise to bring your estimate down to 110-120 wpm. Just to be on the safe side…
So there you have it – the best length for a good wedding speech, and an easy way to calculate that. Now get writing – and don’t forget to practise!
About the author: Alexander Westenberg, milestone speechwriter, is a teacher, a musician, and long-time speechwriter. Read more…
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Inside you’ll find learn:
- Why the wedding speech matters
- The 3 most common hooks for your speech
- The time-tested 'Rule of One' that can make the difference between a speech that makes an impact... and a speech that doesn't
- 4 steps to finishing your speech with the perfect wedding toast
- ...and more!